Here’s the thing. To clarify what everybody already knows, the Resident Evil movies are pretty stupid. They’re the epitome of big, dumb popcorn movie fun. I still kind of love them (Well, some of them). It’s the “Guilty Pleasure” branch of cinema – big, loud, brassy nonsense that puts a smile on your face. We all probably wish they were a bit better; that there was better character drama to go with the immersive visuals and bonkers action, but the films deserve some credit too.
Not just for the spectacle, but for delivering some good zombie action before it was a commercial craze and for delivering one kickass action heroine after the next. Sure, Alice always has her thighs out for some reason (Alice’s Road Warrior garters in Extinction are an all-timer of stupid sexy costuming) and it would be nice to see women with that kind of training dress a bit more tactically, but you’d be hard-pressed to find another franchise that is overflowing with so many female characters who call the shots and save the day. And on a completely shallow note, you’ll be hard pressed to find anyone who looks cooler than Jovovich does running full-speed while double fisting shotguns.
But all the grand gunplay and extravagant spectacle of the post-apocalypse is about to come to an end with Resident Evil: The Final Chapter, which lands in theaters this week. Before we get to the end, let’s take a look back on all the extreme action and absurd story that brought us to this point, ranked from worst to best. And stay tuned for an updated list after The Final Chapter drops.